Saturday, June 22, 2013
Ladies: 10 Things You Should NEVER Say To Your Boyfriend, Under ANY Circumstance
1) "My ex did the exact same
thing!"
Whether it's a desirable
resemblance (they both always
hold the door open) or a less
desirable one (neither one
showers often enough), your
boyfriend never wants to hear that he's anything like your ex.
Ever.
You don't want him to feel like you're always comparing the
two of them, do you? Think about it: Do you really want him
to imagine that he does other things just like your ex?
Doubtful. Plus, he might think you're still hung up on your
former flame.
Either way, a comment like this won't do much for his self-
esteem. So the next time you experience boyfriend deja-vu,
keep it to yourself.
2) "helen's pregnant ... shhhh"
Remember on Séx and the City when Carrie tells Aidan that
Miranda's pregnant but that he can't tell Steve? Remember
how upset Aidan was to hear the incriminating news? Your
boyfriend doesn't want to hear information that could get him
into trouble. And even if he does want to hear it, he really
shouldn't.
Don't burden him with someone else's secret. And besides, if
he does spill the beans, your friend is going to be mad at you,
not him.
Along the same lines, he doesn't want to hear about your
friend's yeast infections, her irregular periods or her IBS. It's
bad enough he has to hear about yours.
3) "when we're married/have kids..."
It's natural to fantasize about wedded bliss and the three kids
you and your beau will one day spawn - you're only human.
And sometimes you might even entertain this fantasy very
early on in arelationship. But unless you want to scare him
away permanently, keep thoughts like these in your head
where they belong.
Even if he himself has thought about your happily-ever-after
future, he probably doesn't want to hear it described out loud
just yet. Wait until you're on the same page, regarding
marriage, kids, and the future of your relationship before you
start prophesizing. A gut feeling probably isn't good enough.
4) "do you think she's pretty?"
When you ask a question like this, your boyfriend knows he
can't win.
If he says "yes," you'll probably get jealous and upset. You
might even follow up with "Is she prettier than me?" Talk
about a loaded question!
Of course, if he says "no" (and she clearly is pretty), you'll
accuse him of being a liar. You'll wonder what else he's lying
about, even as you assure him you don't mind if he says "yes."
Pfff…as if you're that insecure!
Has he managed to convince you that he genuinely doesn't
find her attractive at all? You'll wonder what his bad taste
says about you.
See?
5) "I'm fine" or "Never mind"
Your face says it all. So does the fact that you haven't said a
word in the past hour. And the way you snapped over the
misplaced remote control isn't hiding anything either. But
when he asks if you're okay, you say you're fine. At this point,
your boyfriend wants to tear his hair out.
Passive-aggressive behavior doesn't help anyone. First, you
miss an opportunity to actually address what's bothering you.
You also bottle up your frustrations and create new problems.
By the time you actually try to tackle what's really bothering
you, you're both too upset about too many things to have a
constructive discussion.
6) "I just let one go" In a man's mind, women only use the
bathroom to re-apply their lipstick (or, at the very worst, pee).
They know they're kidding themselves, but they really don't
want any physical, verbal, or olfactory indication of the
contrary.
Announcing your bodily function means he can no longer
blame the dog. Suddenly, you're one of the guys, and not in a
séxy, "I watch football and drink beer but I'm still a girlie-
girl" kind of way.
Sure, he'll get over it. He may even laugh about it from time
to time. But he'd still prefer that it never happened. So
depending on how squeamish your guy is, you might want to
wait till you're married to be disgusting.
7) "I'll try anything once!"
Because unless you really, really, really mean it, don't get his
hopes up.
8) "Are you sure you're okay?"
(Repeatedly. Even after he's told you he really is okay.)
Sometimes we're thrown off guard when our guy is
uncharacteristically quiet. We'll prod and probe, hoping to get
to the bottom of their issue (and too often, we're absolutely
sure it's something we'vedone). When in reality, there may
not be a concrete reason at all.
Men have bad days too - they can be moody, tired, or just
generally not feel like talking. They're only human! As hard
as it can be, don't read into it too much. Give him his space
and keep yourself busy until he snaps out of it.
Ask him what's bothering him over and over again and the
only honest answer will be "You."
9) "I hate my thighs" If he didn't find you attractive, he
wouldn't be with you in the first place. Period, end of story.
Putting yourself down in front of him makes you look
insecure, and just in case you didn't know, men really hate
that (see #6). Just like women, they're usually attracted to self-
confidence and put off by its opposite.
Think about it. Would you want to be with a man who
constantly talked about how much he hated his calves or how
he felt like a failure in his career? Uh, no way.
In addition, you'll draw attention to flaws that he probably
never even noticed before. No one else looks as closely at
your body as you do. In all likelihood, you are your own
worst critic. Don't recruit him.
10) "I hate your mom"
Likewise for his friends, his siblings, his dad … even his
dog.
If he really loves someone or something, don't hate on 'em.
You may not get along perfectly witheveryone in his life, but
try your hardest to be diplomatic in your relationships with
people he really cares about. Be open-minded about what he
sees in them (things that may not be immediately obvious to
you).
Maybe Deadbeat Dave is his oldest friend - the person he
survived middle school with; the onlyperson who stood by
him when he lost his job a couple years back. Maybe despite
his lack of attention to hygiene, he's got a heart of gold.
If you love your man, you'll trust his judgment.
And whatever you do, don't ever make him pick a side. If it's
between you and his mom, you'll lose every time.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment